The one where we went to Outback Steakhouse

Picture it: Southwest Miami, the late 90s, a dimly lit restaurant, and a "Bloomin' Onion" centered on the wooden booth. My mom, sister, dad, and I were enjoying a family night at Papi's (that's what I call my dad #latinocultureFTW) favorite restaurant, Outback Steakhouse.

--As we venture deeper into this blog, you'll learn more about my relationship with my dad, but let's keep it light for now.--

I must have been 6 or 7 at the time, but I remember the conversation vividly. If I were to dissect why it's cemented in my long-term memory 25+ years later, I think it was a heightened sensory moment. The more I learned about the science of learning, the more I believe in the tenets of IPT (information processing theory) and how our senses are the stewards of meaning-making.

Anyway, back to the setting: Outback, the 90s, family dinner, and the causal discussion of zodiac signs. Here's the thing: as it stands, my mother is devoutly religious and believes astrology to be a sin against God, but back then, homegirl was a proud Sagittarius. No, seriously, she smiled that beguiling Sag smile, and uttered a long "oh yesss" when my sister tried to confirm if she was indeed a Sagittarius. Papi, ever the Leo, puffs out his chest and says, "y yo, yo soy un Leo" (for my non-Spanish speakers, the Leo did precisely what the Leo was expected to do: announce his Leoness); Mabel, my sister, points to herself and claims she's a Gemini, and me, 6 years her junior, but only 10 days apart in birthdays, blurts out, "that means I'm a Gemini too!"

Not quite. They all shake their heads vigorously but oddly synchronously. "No, no, mamita... Cancer," Mami says.

"I don't have Cancer!"

"Noooooo, dodohead, it's your zodiac sign; you're not a Gemini like me; you're a Cancer, the crab."

"A crab?! What does that even mean? What are all of you?"

"A LION! The King of the Jungle" (Straight-up, he's got soooo much Leo in his chart).

"Twins!"

"Ummm, half human, half horse, I believe."

And I'm a little crab? Immediately, I felt left out. I was a creature that people could eat at Mami's favorite restaurant, Red Lobster, while Dad was a lion, Mom was half a horse, and my sister was TWO people in one (more on that later). After that day, I tried to renounce my celestial ID, always saying, "I don't believe in that stuff" whenever someone discussed astrology.

Until I lived in New York.

In my 6th year of city living, I was depressed, broke, and open to anything that could explain to me why I felt so deeply and why "vibes" and a person's "energy" felt tangible to me. So, naturally, I did what any broke, 20-something-year-old teacher in the city would do: I walked into a local crystal shop. Then, I started to listen more to my friends, peers, and anyone on the train (when my headphones were off) about how they described themselves. Astrology, their Sun Sign, in particular, was a constant.

"I'm an Aquarius... you know what that means" (no, actually, but tell me more).

"I'm a Virgo, like Queen Bey (gestures a crown)."

"I'm a Libra (gestures scales)."

And, I'm at a loss because what the heck does it mean to be a crab?

Well, here's the long and short of it: it's so much more than being a Cancer, which I hope to chat with you about in this blog (I would be remiss if I didn't openly admit how I eagerly throw up my claws, prompted or otherwise now that I understand my birth chart more deeply). I'll explain how to read your birth chart, why this celestial blueprint was your soul's explicit roadmap to a bigger purpose, and get very real about my healing journey through my Astro rabbit holes, experience working in teaching and learning, and my work overcoming a multitude of trauma I thought was simply a right of passage into humanity and womanhood.

Feel free to "take it or leave it;" if I were to feed into my stereotype, sure, you 'leaving it" would make me cry, but just wait until you cross paths with my Mars in Leo-- she's a real one.

Oh yeah, and Hi, I'm Lauren; I'm a [June] Cancerian who tries to use astrology to help inform what I understand about a person's personality, spiritual journey, and inner-most self. Then, I use epistemology and science to explain how the brain works within that framework (because, well, I'm a teacher-nerd). For kicks, I started doing spin as a hobby, and now I'm a spin instructor, so I'm all about that holistic trifecta: body, mind, and soul.

And on that note, I'll catch you on my next post (or nah-- I'll *eventually* get over it).

*shamelessly crab walks into the abyss (you'll soon learn my flare for the dramatic)*

Sidenote: I really hope you noticed I alluded--loosely-- to The Golden Girls with this intro sentence and Friends with my title-- because, millennial.